Friday, December 29, 2006
Monday, December 25, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
We see them every day, walking past them on the street, in the grocery store, the poor, the ugly, the lonely, the insane. They have nothing except for a moment's shameful glance from the people they pass, not even a memory is spared for them, they are forgotten. They have no home, they know no love, they do not exist save when they are seen by the public eye. No one knows where they go, who they are, what they do, and nobody cares. We pity them, but yet we'll have nothing to do with them. They cry alone with not a single soul to comfort them. We are the abandoned, we are God's failed experiments, we are the damned...
Not even the screaming rage that resonates from your lips can drown out the ringing in my ears. And I look at you with eyes that are on fire in a glowing halo of hatred. My voice, always thought to be so quiet, begins to rise in a violent crescendo as I explode in a furry of anger, helplessness, and misery. Kicking around all the shit on the floor, throwing over tables and shelves. I shove you into the TV that hasn't worked in months as I'm met with the stream of obscenities that erupts from your throat in a deafening scream of fear, and anger. Finally we break down, holding each other as we cry on the floor. Laying on top the endless piles of junk that masks a floor that hasn't been seen in years, this mess we call our home, attracting, and infested with insects and rodents that scurry out from under us. We stare at each other in contemptuous disgust. I hate you just as much as you hate me, but we have no one else, we have nowhere to go, and no one to love. We know that we need each other.
Monday, December 18, 2006
Take your fear out on me, turn your back and walk away like nothings left. But when you look back dont expect me to still be there. And dont point a finger at promises or lies when youre the one that walked away. A destroyed heart can no longer be broken so not a tear will be shed for you.
And if you should ever find me again you will only find my back towards you. I have been very generous with forgiveness but now you posses all that Ive had to give, so no guilt will be felt for your long-winded accusations. Yes, there is sympathy underlying the anger but that is a part of me you will no longer see. Im fighting now so you wont tear me down because I know sometime soon youre going to come around but not a single of your words are going to fix the damage of your abandonment.
Youre getting what you wanted as I'm slowly stepping away, so why are you still pushing? And why are you angry that I'm so far away? After all I'd sacrificed, and all that I was to give, you took them very ungratefully, and even my smallest requests were just too much for you to give. So make a wish my beautiful dying angel. Your single wish I will grant you, but dont you dare shed a tear when your thoughtless wish comes true.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Shall I dance naked through the flames
And my cries of elation shall echo,
Through the desolate nighttime skies
Shall you not join me
My Twilight Star
Join with me in the conflagration
And we shall toast the world goodnight
No longer shall you have to lead me
I only ask of you one thing
When the fires have died
And the screams have silenced
Let me fold my feathered wings around you
Let me protect you from the evil of man
Let me share with you the wonders I have dreamt
Let me show guide your path home
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Monday, December 11, 2006
But is this fact really true?
Age, race, and sex can be overcome
And yet these factors hold us back
Yet these factors seace to exist
When these two arrow lovers met
Both of them felt their love had a chance
Did it matter that they were the same sex?
Many consider their love and bond unatural
But isn't love still a natural feeling?
Shunned from everyone but themselves
They share a love;
Friday, December 08, 2006
And please don't think that I no longer care, even as I'm shoving you, even as I'm screaming to tear out your throat. And even as my teeth grind in hatred, you know through my alcohol laden kisses that I still love you. I just wish you would stop staring at me. What are you expecting here? I can't tell you what you want to hear, not even when I'm like this. And how do you think it makes me feel knowing that I could destroy you with one little word? I'm filled with guilt for something I haven't even done yet, and from this guilt anger is born, and in that anger I want to destroy you.
But it doesn't take long for me to forget about all that and my loud laugh and slurred yelling lightens my spirits once again, and announces what a mess I really am. But who am I to care when I'm not even me then anyway? I'm just another spectator. I laugh at my stupidity, and shout obscenities at the mirror. I jump on the bed and hit myself just to prove that I don't feel anything anymore.
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Can you silence this violent mind
Stained by so many fears and lies
Planted within the darkest soil
Malignant roots empowering me
Dispersing even more evil seeds.
Do not awake but look my child,
Look out into your fantastic sea;
Behind your eyes there lies demise,
Look upon it with all your curiosity.
Heaven has given you a gift of sight
Which hell hath perfected and given to me;
That I may guide you, taint, and blind you
Of the truths hidden within divinity.
Time out of mind you have fallen, my child,
Look far beyond what you can see;
Fallen, abandoned, unloved, and unwanted
Thus you were delivered to me,
That I may guard you, defend, and barb you
From whomsoever believeth in He.
Take comfort in this empty darkness
For you are loved by none save me.
In my words you'll find no truths
No revelations of what's to be;
But in these lies you'll find, my child,
That the world becomes easier to see.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
The Story Blog
1 Body 2 Soul
Gay Men Rule
The Photo Blog
a dRAF boiz' Breakfast
Moody's Gorgeous Life
Guccy Gay XTube
Tom @ Paris
Friday, December 01, 2006
The G* Spot Weblog Award Will Start on Monday, December 04, 2006. I Have put up the logo where you can click to nominate or read the other details about it!
I have installed a cool software in my blog, BlogSnapper.
So everybody who have a webcam out there! I dare you to take a pose and click that button! Choose your best angle guys! and show the world how cute your are! Check it out on the Side Bar! Please take the shot, will you? Don't Worry, NO RESTRICTION! (wink)
I have also incorporated HaloScan as a commenting tools for my site for those people who are not hosted by blogger, since my blogger comment page is filtered and wont take anonymous user. So you guys wont have no more reason to say something about what you see and read here, ayt?
and oh yeah, let me the first one to say....
Merry Christmas You Guys!!!!
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Sometimes that person seems beautiful,
most of the time however the person I see is annoying,
I see so many things that I have been,
so many more things that I could have been.
So much I have poured down the drain just to induce the tears
and regrets that seem to feed some kind of fucked up craving in me;
a repetitious emotional suicide.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Five finalists will be selected every week from the nominations thru the comment space of this post or thru the email address, firstname.lastname@example.org
The categories are:
The Story Blog
The Photo Blog
The voting phase at THE G* SPOT WEBLOG AWARD is a public and open process -- so take a look at all the blogs that are finalists -- you just might find some amazing (and often sexy) new reads.
Voting will close every monday (Philippine Standard Time) winners will be announced and will be notified with a winner's trophy button where they can place in their respective blogs.
Nominations is now officially open...
Monday, November 27, 2006
Humanforsale.com will try to evaluate your "monetary worth" as human by answering their rather lengthy survey form. Just for fun I indulge you to take the survey and know your "worth."
After answering their survey, truthfully as i can, the generated page tells me that I am actually and exactly worth $5,333,286.00 and nothing more and was name as most expensive male for this day.
Sad though that both of us was devaluated by $ 40, 000 simply because we are members of the LGBT community.
Sunday, November 26, 2006
He’s got rugged good looks, smoldering eyes, a chiseled physique, hairy chest, aquiline nose and bronze complexion; Polo Ravales is just oozing in testosterone and is ablaze with sex appeal. It’s no doubt that this sun-kissed hottie is ripe for the picking!
This complete repacking is bound to shoot this young star to new heights after he was handpicked to be the latest style star to represent fashion house Folded & Hung’s latest campaign.
Although Polo welcomed the change in image, he admits to having put a lot of effort into it.
“I felt I wasn’t ready for it yet. Not only acting-wise but because I didn’t have the proper physique. So I had to work hard for it,” Polo said.
The change seems to have all worked for the good, leading to further highly popular roles in Encantadia, Now and Forever, indie film Roomboy, and the Metro Manila Film Festival top-biller Blue Moon. His latest movie is Joel Lamangan's "Manay po" whom he played as a straight acting gay.
photos from folded and Hung, Penis Talk, and Hunky Male Celeb
Quotes from various magazine
Thursday, November 23, 2006
Hindi mo ako pag-aari, kung kaya't hindi mo akong kayang diktahan.
Walang may hawak ng aking tinig kundi ako at ako lang
Walang tali ang aking mga kamay, lalo na ang aking kamalayan
Kung kaya't hahayaan ko itong pumayagpag
Hindi mo ako pag-aari, walang sino man
Walang ibang maglalagay ng titik sa aking mga sipi kundi ako lang
Walang taong didighay sa kung anong wika ang aking isasambit
Malaya ako, lalakeng pinagpaguran ang aking kalayaan
Hindi mo ako pag-aari, magpahanggan pa man
Walang maaring makapag-ari ng aking pagkatao
Walang maaring makapagpigil sa kung ano ang aking gusto
Walang sino man ang maaaring maniil sa indayog at ihip ng aking malay
Ang isip mo ang lumikha na maari mong ariin ang iyong kapwa
Sinundan ng lipunan at ng simbahan ang yapak ng iyong daan
Hindi mo ba naiintindihan? Ako ay may kanyang isip at may kamalayan
Hindi mo ako pag-aari, walang sino man.
Thats ME in the photo. forgive the hair, am on the beach after all. lolz
taken in one of our trip in puerto galera.
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
And now I prepare to come crawling back home to you as a failure, a disappointment, a disgrace. I dont know what youre going to say but I dont much care. You refused to help me, you werent there when I needed you; you abandoned me. Yet when I return I know youre going to act as though nothing happened, nothing was wrong. But I will not be with you long, my return to you will be short, and then I will be moving on elsewhere. I havent the faintest clue where I will go to, I dont much care at this point. I think you know how much I miss you, but you dont have the smallest idea how much I hate you. I look forward to telling you to your face, and then leaving home once again in another attempt at another unattainable dream.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
If there is one man I fantasized getting in bed that is Borgy Manotoc.
born on April 9, 1983, in Honolulu. He is the grandson of the late Philippine President Ferdinand Marcos and son of re-elected Ilocos Norte representative Imee Marcos. His father, sportsman Tommy Manotoc, gave him the moniker Borgy, after the tennis icon Bjorn Borg. Manotoc has vague recollections of his childhood.
The EDSA Revolution, which deposed Marcos and sent the First Family into exile, is history to him. His earliest memory of childhood was studying in London. The Manotocs travelled intensively and lived in Portugal. Florida and Singapore before returning to the Philippines. He went to Ateneo and International School, then started his college course in San Diego before transferring to New York.
Borgy is a model/actor in the Philippines. To legions of Filipino consumers, the memory of advertising image of Manotoc’s lean, muscular frame and six-pack abs, encased only in a pair of Bench jeans still lingers.
Manotoc doesn’t exactly fit the mould of the glamorous bachelor with the jet-setting lifestyle in the back book of glamorous girlfriends. He is the antithesis to the Filipinos’ perception of a Marcos. The Marcoses are known for their dramatic and fashionably late entrances. Manotoc is punctual for his appointments. His family is “perplexed,” as Manotoc says, that he chucks in read meat and fancy cuisine for tofu, soy patties and veggie burgers, and colas for soy milk.
His grandmother, former First Lady Imelda Marcos, his mother, Representative Maria Imelda “Imee” Marcos and his aunt, Irene Araneta, are in fashion’s Hall of fame for their unerring taste in designer clothes and blingblings. Manotoc, on the other hand, shops in New York’s thrift shop and vintage boutiques for clothes that express his individuality. If the Marcosses have been notorious for their flash and panache, Manotoc is the quintessential G.I or Genuine Ilocacano.
His prudence is trait inherent in the people of Marcos country, Ilocos. “I’m kuripot [frugal] all the way. At times I splurge but I save a lot. It’s part of who I am. It’s important to think of my goals. Money is very fleeting; and it’s not easy to acquire, I try to make do what I can. There’s no need to live an excessive lifestyle. I don’t need it,” he says.
Unlike the Marcoses who where encircled by sycophants in their halcyon days. Manotoc is quick to deflect any kind of flattery.” It’s important to surround yourself with good people. My friends have treated me no differently, regardless of the celebrity status I have achieved,” He adds that his brothers keep him from getting swell-headed. “That’s the way our dynamics are. That’s what I love about them. They keep me in check.”
Manotoc’s enthusiasm, simplicity, clear thinking and candour – to say nothing of his rugged looks and flushing white teeth win admiration. He is characteristically polite, graciously excusing himself to answer a call from his mother. Later on, he insists on picking on the tab, instead of allowing this journalist to exercise etiquette when interviewing sources.
He is the antithesis to the Filipinos’ perception of a Marcos… If the Marcoses have been notorious for their flash and panache, Manotoc is the quintessential G.I. or Genuine Ilocano.”
A health buff, Manotoc slowly eats his fruit platter and eschews the cottage cheese. His lunch is accompanied by a glass of ice cold water. He reveals that the ambience of a five-star hotel is not part his world. “I live two different lives. My reality here and my reality abroad are so completely opposite,” he says.
He is a junior at the City College of New York, majoring in advertising and public relations, and works part-time at an independent record label, earning modestly doing A & R. Like most locals, he goes around the city by foot or by subway. More than anything, he enjoys a democratic society that accepts him for being himself. He sees life in New York as a quest for testing his powers, yet he knows he would meet a host of a college student to that of a “bottom feeder of society, scrounging around for the next meal.” When Imelda Marcos is in New York, Borgy is shown affluence – the limousine service, fancy restaurant and Waldorf-Astoria. From his school in East Harlem, an unglamorous part of New York, he meets her in midtown. “I couldn’t even go to this place she was taking me because I didn’t have a suit,” he says. “That’s not my everyday kind of thing. But I get to see the whole social hierarchy.”
During Christmas and summers, Manotoc flies home to the Philippines, where he is exposed to the lifestyle of the elite and faces the blessing and the curse of being grandson of President Ferdinand Marcos. “I was always this free-wheeling kid. I never thought about who I was. It was a humbling experience to learn about being part of something bigger than you, “he says.
For all his effervescence and playfulness, Manotoc reveals that he’s also not the easiest person to live with, especially with undercurrents of stubbornness and impulsiveness. He admits that he could borrow a lesson on compromise and balance. “I do everything at full steam all the time. It’s hard to live with me because I either go all the way or not at all. I can get up and down. If people are not consistent, it’s hard to predict the way they are going to act. At the same time, I like people that way because they keep me interested.”
This year, Manotoc is looking ahead at what is still out there to be conquered. “I don’t believe in fate, but I believe in creating destiny. It’s up to us to fulfill it.”
Presently, with her Grandmother creating beautiful jewerly colletions, Borgy is humored to run for the Mayoralty race in Manila.
Most Beatiful Men and Blue soda for the Photos
Various Magazine articles featuring Borgy Manotoc.
Monday, November 20, 2006
The man, identified as Shahab Darvishi, was charged for “moral corruption, battering and sodomy”.
The public hanging drew hundreds of cheering people. The execution brings to at least 117 the number of people executed in Iran this year.
Amnesty International has said there were 94 executions in Iran in 2005.
Capital offences in the Islamic republic include murder, rape, armed robbery, apostasy, blasphemy, serious drug trafficking, repeated sodomy, adultery or prostitution, treason and espionage.
Friday, November 17, 2006
I seek attention, and as much as I deny it, I seek praise. When you're told throughout your childhood that you're slow, stupid, ugly, a failure, an outcast, a freak, a waste, you either give in and admit defeat, or you do everything you can to prove those titles wrong.
Sitting in an overwhelming pile of impossible deadlines, projects, expectations, and trying to excel at everything, the stress builds up. The dizzy spells, the loss of appetite, insomnia, stomach pain, headaches, loss of energy; all I can do is work, but I cant even focus on that.
I'm trying so hard to be everything that I've always dreamed, to be everything that everybody said I would never be. Trying to be happy, inspirational, successful.
I'm trying so hard to live a dream that I can't seem to wake myself up to realize that I am none of what I'm trying so hard to be.
I'm trying so hard to excel at everything that I excel at nothing.
No matter what I try to do I will always come up empty.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Kagabi usapin sa "correspondent" ang tungkol sa mga aso, sa pagkatay at pagkain nito.Oo, ito ang nakaklungkot na katotohanan, na sa kabila ng batas na umiiral sa pagbabawal sa pagkakatay at pagkain ng mga ito ay patuloy itong isinasagawa ang lantad na lihim na ito na madalas ay nagaganap sa bulubundukin ng Mt Province at mga karatig bayan nito. At hindi rin makakaila na maging dito mismo sa siyudad ng kalakhang Maynila, paborito pa ring pulutan ang mga aw aw.
Lumaki ako sa isang pamilyang mapagmahal sa hayop. Ako ata lahat na ng hayop na pwedeng maalagaan inalagaan ko na - ahas, daga, manok, ibon, pusa at siyempre pa nga ang aso. Sa katanuyan, noong nakaraang Agosto lang ay pagkamatay ng mga tutang alaga ko ang sanhi ng pagpatak ng maramaing luha ko para sa taong ito. Masakit na sa kabila ng lahat, maging hanggang sa huling pamamaraan ng pagsasalin ng dugo sa kanila ng kanilang beterinaryo ay nabigo kaming isalba ang kanilang mga munting buhay.
Kung kaya't ang usapin tungkol sa kabrutalan ng paraan ng pagkakatay sa mga hayop ito ay sadyang me pitak aking puso. Halos maririnig sa kanilang mga tahol ang pagmamakaawa para sa kanila buhay, lalot na nga bang tayong mga tao ay itinuring nila mga matalik na kaibigan. Nakakalungkot isipin na ang patuloy na inaabusong dahilan ay ang kulturang pinagmulan lalo na nga ba't pilit na tinutukoy ng ilan na ang pagkatay at pagkain sa mga aso at pagsasaalang alang sa kulturang kinagawian mula pa sa mantang panahon ng pagsasagawa ng mga ritwal.
Innocence And Unconditional Love Betrayed By People
Who Are Nothing But Soulless Demons From Hell!
Wala akong tutol kung sa layunin ng pagbibigay pugay sa Dakilang Lumikha ang dahilan ng pagkatay, o panalangin sa paghingi ng lunas sa mga karamdaman ng ating mga ninuno tulad na nga ng nakagawain ng mga kapatid na igorot.
Ang hindi ko matatanggap ay ang walang habas na pagkatay ng mga ito para gawing pulutan ng mga taong nais patunayan ang kanilang pagiging lalake o simpleng pagnanais makatikim ng kakaibang putahe kalahok ang pagtagay ng gin o beer.
At wag na wag mong ikakatwirang dahil sa kahirapan kung kaya't mas pinili mong kumain ng aso dahil sa kamahalan ng mga karne ng baboy at baka. Eh hindi nga ba't me salaping pambili ka ng alak na tutunggain mo.
Nakakalungkot na maging ang mga ninunong noong ay pinag alayan ng mga Banal na Asong ito upang mabigyan ng lunas ang kanilang karamdaman ay mahihiya sa kasulukuyang "kultura" ng pagkain ng mga aso. Nakakalungkot isipin na ang noong banal na pamamaraan ay hinaluan na nating kababawan ng pag iisip at pag aalipusta sa ating kasaysayan. Nakakalungkot isipin na tayong mga taong nilikhang mas mataas na nilalang at tagapamahala ng mga buhay na mas nakakangat ang ating pag iisip ay umaaktong tila mas mababa pa ang pag iisip kaysa sa mga hayop na ito.
Sa ngayon, meron akong bagong alagang aso, si "shifu" (shih tzu breed) at hanggang ngayon naalala ko pa rin yung mga namatay kong aso. Subukan ninyong pagtangkaan ang aso ko!!! Grrrr...
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
I’ve touched and tasted sin
my feelings are inert-lysome shallow hidden whim
and my attractions are perversions
as most transgressions do begin.
It’s a mental-sexual-misplacement
of vile and sheer disgust
suppressed by an unloved childhood
and triggered by an untamed lust
desperately infecting my emotions
as most diseases must.
He had an unaffectionate mother
is what they’ve come to say and a permanent lack of attention
is why he lives this way
but I rejected the biased diagnosis
happy, and proud to be gay.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Did we fly through skies of orange and violet on astral angelic wings? I opened the box of a universe last night and drew from it a star to present you, to hold in your heart, but when I awoke this morning I watched it wash away with the flood of the morning's light.
Did you dream of me my darling?
Did we dance in fields of ethereal twilight meant only for the beings of Heaven?
I watched you radiate like a holy entity, bathed in the light, and blessings of God.
I watched you fade from my eyes into beauty I could not behold.
I watched you fly to heights I could not reach, even in my dream. And when I awoke I saw you fade from my world.
I watch you here in admiration, for that is all I am granted. I admire but cannot want, for angels were not meant for mortals.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
It's all for a good cause
Every year, more than 40,000 women in the Uk are diagnosed with Breast Cancer, and more than 12,000 die. For every calendar sold, Urban Photography is making a donation to Breast Cancer Charities. The majority of the money we raise will be donated to Cancer Research UK, who are one of the largest charities funding research into breast cancer.
I hope some photographers here in the country can read this, im sure it will be a big hit!