Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Power OFF?

Faith kept me searching for everything Id lost, but never gave me any clue of what I was searching for. In the confusion and searching in vain for something Id never find I lost my faith and forgot what it was.

I abandoned hope today, it wasnt getting me anywhere. All it did was blind me with fantasies of tomorrow so much that I couldnt function in the reality of today.

I did away with the idea; all it did was get in the way of becoming what I really wanted to be. While I was at it I destroyed the superego for trying to make me something Im not.

Emotion and intuition cannot be trusted so they were the next to go, and reason is too analytical, and only seems good at pointing out the obvious, its really just taking up space.

Memories only serve to drag me down so I swept those from my mind. Inhibitions seem to limit my greatest desires, so theres no sense in keeping those around.

Consciousness is relative, conformed, and closed in so Im slowly shutting that down also.

Last Sunday, after attending mass at MMC (Metropolitan Community Church - its a church for the LGBT Community here in the Country, I will do a feature on it soon) Mantra and I went to the Baywalk Area in Malate, Manila to have a our long uverdue dinner date in that area. We grabbed a table in Anthology Bar were they are featuring some live bands, exactly what both of us like - good food and good music.

After a while, one of the patron of the Bar, a japanese national came to the stage and requested to sing an original composition.

"We are here on Manila, me and partner for a business trip.. I hope you guys like this one, this an original composition i wrote two years ago.." his spill.

The song has good beat but what strike me most was the words laid on it: "You Hope to be Best, But what have you done lately... You hope to run the distance But you are to afraid to run."

It generally talk about how we hope and dream and coward we are to face these dreams and the obstacles that goes with it.

So, today, I am leaving my day as the seconds ticks. Focusing on what truly is essential towards achieving those dreams. I am focusing my life away from the nightmares of the past, brave enough facing my tomorrow.

Power Off. Switch Mode.

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