Wednesday, December 14, 2005
On Letting Go
I was kinda feeling lazy waking up on a Saturday morning but I have to because we have an overtime work to do in the office. So, I push myself to prepare myself and go to work.
I arrive 7:55 am (whew!) in the office. As usual, tita cecille (we call her “inang”) is already there waiting in the lobby (she hates going upstairs alone coz she is afraid a ghost might just pop up in the scene). So right after I tick my card we set ourselves to go upstairs to our office. Just when we approach to open the door she screamed “Me ibon, Paano nakapasok ang ibon ditto!?”
I, still feeling lazy was not really paying attention to any words she is saying. She kept talking to me, “Khalel, me ibon.”
And when I finally get to absorb the things she is saying, I turned my eyes to the creatures. Yes, the poor thing is threaten by our presence especially when I rushed myself to catch him (or her, really cant figure this out but for the sake of this writing let this bird be tag as a “him”). It was a hard catch really because I am also hesitant and somewhat scared of laying my hand, seeing its almost two inches beak, I am scared that because of the threat we put unto him he might strike me with it and find myself bleeding.
After a series of trying to catch it. Alas! I finally held him in my hand. It was a big bird really and gorgeous with its patterned feather. I immediately got the tape dispenser and clipped his wings and put tape on it. I decided to keep him. I was happy with that catch. After all it is really a beautiful bird.
I enclosed him with one of the “salakab” (a kawayan made contraption use on catching fish) that we are to use for the Christmas decoration. In a minute, voila! The it’s a instant temporary cage for him. After making sure that he now cant go no where, I opted to start with my work.
I occasionally check on him to see if he is trying to escape from his cage.
One by one my officemates arrived, we are really rushing too many paper works so we are all rendering overtime for the whole month. Everybody is please with my catch. Everybody is excitedly asking me to relive the story of catching him. So I do tell them about the whole thing and deal of story of catching him.
As usual Mark (we call him “dokdok”) is late. It was really in his table that I place the “salakab cage” it is strategically a much clearer table than what I have.
“Ay me ibon, buhay ba ito?” He curiously asked not really pertaining the question to any one. I guess because he don’t know who own the bird.
“Si Khalel.” One of my officemate decided to answer back his query thrown to the air.
“Khalel, buhay ba ito? Bakit parang nakadikit lang?” he continued.
So I decided to throw a look on the cage and saw Mark trying to see if really that bird is alive. Then the bird move.
“Ah, akala ko di buhay.” He said smiling.
I still kept my eyes set on the bird. Then it came to me, what I am doing to this poor creature. I clipped his wings and put him in a cage. Yes, it can be true, the bird mught just die.
I was battling it out in mind whether should I free or keep him. Then finally the resolution came. I stand up got him out of the cage. And slowly tried to take out the tape I put on his wings. He is somewhat crying really probably because it is scared or getting hurt with what I am doing with him. And no matter how I tried to be extra careful handling things of taking away the bondage I place onto him some of his flight feathers is destroyed and left his body. Finally, the tape is out. He is still making that sound of seemingly crying for the damage I put him.
I am still holding him in hand while slowly stroking his head to at least pacify him.
“Sorry for being so stupid of putting you the tape and trying to place you in a cage.” I told him.
I held him in my hand and rush my way to the fire exit.
“Again, I am sorry. I hope one day you can forgive me.”
Then, slowly I open up my hand and he tried to open up his damage wings and flew.