Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Under Construction

Note:
Guys, please bare with me. I am again, remodelling the templates of this site. Also, if you have any suggestion please try to drop me a line or two, so i can incorporate it in the new design.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Out




His eyes strayed, though he told them not to. The boys were cruel. They boasted and sauntered around, they fought and laughed. But damn, they looked so good. Jed Marquez couldn't help but gaze at the half clothed buffet of boys laid out in front of him.

"What're you looking at, faggot?" Someone shoved him up against his locker from behind, though he couldn't tell whom, and he didn't really want to look.

Jed closed his eyes as he went about his business, ignoring the occasional push or shove he received. Most of the other boys in the locker room had left by the time Jed was pulling on his shirt. Looking across the open locker room, Jed's eyes set upon Glenn Santos, a known gay in the school. Glenn had gotten picked on earlier on, right after he came out, until his older brother started threatening violence upon the jerks that were doing it. Greg Santos was the MVP for the school's basketball team, and very protective of his little brother. He graduated two years ago, but was still known to rough up guys that messed with Glenn.

The locker room was empty outside of him and Glenn, as well as a few other guys who were quickly emptying out. Each wall and half-wall of that locker room held countless rows and columns of dented green lockers. Wooden benches ran parallel to the walls all the way around the room, and there were three or four benches laid out in lines just in the center of the room. One door led off to the showers a few feet away from where Jed sat.

"... erks, eh?"

Jed snapped out of his reverie to look up at Glenn, "Huh?"

"I said those guys are jerks, eh? Are you okay?" Glenn said, offering his hand down to Jed. Jed hadn't officially come out of the closet yet, but he and Glenn had been friends for a while, and it was rather obvious that Glenn knew, along with the rest of the school.

Placing his hand in Glenn's, Jed scrambled to a stand, smiling at him winsomely, "Y-yeah."

They stood there for several minutes, smiling at each other as they held their hands. Jed suddenly realized what was happening, and drew his hand away, laughing softly. Glenn made a remark about the blush creeping over his face, and that blush reddened.


"So, those exams are gonna be tough, huh," Jed remarked as he counted the large tiles under his feet.

"Yeah, I got a lot of studying to do."

"Do you… do you want to come study at my house, after school?" Jed’s stomach was in knots as he asked that horrible question. Glenn merely smiled and nodded his head yes, and they split company.

The rest of the day, Jed was on cloud nine. He smiled at everyone, and even skipped when no one was looking. He sat at the front of every class, and answered every question with a chirp of an answer and a goofy little smile. He didn’t even mind the obligatory pushes and shoves, nor the name callings he received as he left school that day and rode the bus home.

Jed meticulously placed every hair on his head into a perfect position after showering three times. He brushed, flossed, and rinsed his teeth until the enamel was worn off, and spent twenty minutes hand picking every article of clothing he was going to wear.

He practically jumped out of his flesh when the doorbell rang, barely managing to evade tripping over every object in the house as he darted toward the front door. Composing himself and exhaling deeply, he tried to control his grin as he pulled the door open.

"Hi!" Jed greeted Glenn, his knees almost going weak as that grin lost control once again.

"Hey Jed," Glenn said, holding out the few books he brought, seemingly presenting them for view. Jed took a few of the books from his hands, even though Glenn could have easily carried the books on his own. Jed decided it might be a nice gesture.

Turning around, Jed led Glenn through the house, headed in the roundabout direction of the Marquez kitchen. As they passed through the living room, Glenn's eyes sweeped over the several dozen family pictures hung up there. Jed occasionally stopped beside a window and opened up the blinds covering it, grumbling about the lack of "natural light".

"This your family?" Glenn asked as he stopped before a large portrait hanging on the wall.

"Yeah. That's my dad, Danton, my mom Katrina, and my brother Chris," Jed said as he pointed negligently at three of the people in the family portrait.

"Who's the little girl?"

Jed laughed as he remembered that day. "That's our little cousin, Louise. We were babysitting her and she couldn't be trusted to sit still all by herself outside the studio, so we took the picture with her." Glenn laughed politely. He didn't find all that much humor in it, but he didn't want to appear rude.

They lingered in their very short sojourn toward the kitchen. Glenn asked a few more questions about Jed's family, and Jed responded kindly and asked a few about Glenn in return.

"Do you want something? Soda, maybe?" Jed asked once they arrived in the kitchen. Glenn smiled and accepted a glass of cola, their hands lingering upon each other as they exchanged the beverage. Jed blushed as he walked with Glenn toward the den.

The den was a rather dark room; that is until Jed arrived and opened the one window and turned on a light or two. Boxes of magazines and other knick knacks were stacked up against the wall, covering several dozen more family pictures, and there was one worn-in couch laying against the northern wall, with a coffee table set in front of it. It was generally used as a study, and there was one very old computer sitting on a desk on the far wall, beside a large shelf of books.

"Shall we start?" Glenn asked as they sat down close to each other on the couch.

They flirted as they studied; or rather, they studied as they flirted. Cheeks turned red, hands were touched, and knees were brushed. What began as innocent soon delved into debauchery. The tension in the room was blossoming, as Glenn finally leant toward Jed and pursed his lips. Jed's eyes fluttered closed as electricity flowed through his body like a ground wire.

"What the hell is going on here?" Someone asked in a bitterly calm voice from the doorway.

Standing at the doorway was Danton Marquez, Jed's father. His face was porcelain, and he leveled a malevolent gaze upon the two pubescent lovebirds.

"I should probably go," Glenn said. "I'll see you tomorrow, Jed."

Jed could only dumbly nod at Glenn's statement, his fearful face fixed upon his father in front of him. The lecture that followed was stern and biting. Danton was a devout, right-wing Christian, and his first instinct was to reach for the shelf of bibles and biblical literature.

"...Nor homosexual offenders, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor slanderers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God." Danton spoke in a fervent voice, his eyes leveled upon his cowering son.

"For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error," His father continued on, his voice growing in volume and malice.

And so he ended his recitation of biblical passages with one last sentence, "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind; it is an abomination."

"But why?" Jed cried out, very confused and quite upset.

Jed's father slammed the bible within his hands closed and loomed over his son, "I will not have a faggot living in my house. You are going to get over this sickness, whatever the hell it is, and you are going to do it quickly, or the Hand of God will strike you down!"

"The Hand of God made me. He loves me," Jed cried, coming to his feet and imploringly reaching his hands up toward his father.

"You don't know what you're talking about!" Danton raised the bible up and brought it down on Jed's ear, knocking Jed onto the carpet. Danton casually walked across the den to put the bible back onto the shelf, and left his son curled up on the carpet, sobbing.

A little later, after Jed finally calmed down, he decided to go back to the den. His hands shook as he drew a dictionary from the shelf, opening it up and flipping through the pages.

"Abomination, abomination," Jed ran that word through his head, frowning. He was never very good in English class, and his vocabulary wasn't exactly top notch. He finally pinned down the article he wanted with one finger, and read it.


a-bom-i-na-tion
n.

1. Abhorrence; disgust.
2. A cause of abhorrence or disgust.


Jed chewed those words in his mouth, tears coming to his eyes, "Disgust?" he cried, shoving the book out of his hands as though he were holding lit napalm. His love disgusted his father. He turned that thought over in his mind, growing more teary-eyed by the second. He cried himself to sleep that night.

School that next day was horrible for Jed. He barely looked anyone in the face, trying to conceal the black eye he held in shame. He skipped gym class in the morning so as not to have to face Jack, but to no avail, as Glenn caught Jed after school in the parking lot. Jed's pace quickened as he sought to evade Glenn, but Glenn soon caught up to him easily.

"Where were you today?" Glenn asked as he grabbed Jed's arm.

Jed turned to face Glenn, head hung low pitifully. With a startled gasp, Glenn took his friend's cheeks in his hand, lifting Jed's face up to his. Their lips found each other in an instinctive, comforting kiss, and Jed's eyes closed.

"What happened?" Glenn cooed.

"It's nothing; I accidentally walked into a door, I'm such a klutz," Jed lied, chuckling softly at his 'mistake'. Glenn laughed and pulled Jed into a hug, and Jed timidly returned that hug. They made small talk as they both walked to Glenn's home, and somewhere along that sojourn their hands found each other.

Their relationship bloomed over the weeks. Jed was beat up and picked on less and less, as word spread that he was Glenn's boyfriend, and as word also spread that Glenn's brother would visit harm upon anyone who touched Jed.

"You should go, my dad's coming home any minute," Jed said one day, kissing Glenn on the lips and scooting away from him.

"Why do you have to hide from him? What's going on?" Glenn frowned.

"I... Do you remember that day at school? My black eye?" Jed asked. Glenn was about to answer, but Jed continued on, "That wasn't because I walked into a door. My dad, he hit me the day before. After he saw you and me kiss."

"Oh Jed," Glenn reached out to hug Jed, but he was stopped.

"You really should go. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" Jed smiled and kissed Glenn, and Glenn left.

A few weeks later, after a particularly steamy "study" session, it went further than usual. In that den that started it all, they made love. The house was empty, and Jed's father was at work 'til later that night, so they engaged in that most loving of acts. As they lay there in reverie holding each other, Jed smiled softly and tilted his head to gaze into Glenn's eyes.

"I love y--dad!"

------

"Earlier today, two young men and a middle aged man were found dead in a suburban home. Danton Marquez was the father of one of the two boys, and police reports state that he shot the two teenagers, and then turned the gun on himself. De La Salle University, where the two boys attended, and the entirety of the community, have been thrown into mourning at this senseless tragedy. Funerals are being arranged, and later th--"

"Turn off the television, ma," Chris said, interrupting the monotone drone of the news reporter. With a shaking hand, Katrina Marquez felt for the power button on the remote. When she finally managed to turn off the television, she fell across the couch and held her stomach, sobs shaking her body. Chris walked across the living room to wrap his arms around his mother, and so they held each other; a broken family.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Lube Talk

Among condom users in the country, petroleum jelly, baby oil, hand creams, massage oils and other oil-based lubricants are usually applied as additional lube on condoms. Consumers are largely unaware that oil-based lubricants can break latex condoms in seconds. They often blame the latex for the breakages, and they have perpetuated the myth that condoms are unreliable.

To be assured of safer sex, water-based lube should be used. Water-based lube with powerful, long-lasting lubricating properties do not dry out, which provides a high safety factor in preventing condom breakage.

Some men who have sex with men use condoms with inappropriate lube during anal sex. Shampoo, soap and conditioners are used since these are easily accessible. These can actually cause pain and discomfort when used as lubrication.

Moisture creams and lotions can interfere with the body's pH levels and cause irritation or infection. Oil products become tacky and sticky and are not water-soluble; washing them off becomes a real messy problem.

What Does A Water-Based Lubricant Do?

Can make penetrative sex less painful.

Can increase sensitivity and heighten sexual pleasure when used with condoms.

May protect the vaginal wall and the anal canal from irritation, preventing abrasions, which could cause infections



___________
Note:

Last night, there was a sale on HBC near MCC. So right after the mass - Jed, Marco and I rushed ourselves to the boutique and tried to Grab some stuff.


One of the "interesting" stuff we got is a water based lubricant by body recipe. Pretty Cool really! Hahaha! I hope mantra and I can try it later this night! Lolz!

Homo Santos: David and Jonathan

I Sam 20:1-42

And David fled from Naioth in Ramah, and came and said before Jonathan, What have I done? what is mine iniquity? and what is my sin before thy father, that he seeketh my life?

And he said unto him, God forbid; thou shalt not die: behold, my father will do nothing either great or small, but that he will show it me: and why should my father hide this thing from me? it is not so.

And David sware moreover, and said, Thy father certainly knoweth that I have found grace in thine eyes; and he saith, Let not Jonathan know this, lest he be grieved: but truly as the LORD liveth, and as thy soul liveth, there is but a step between me and death. Then said Jonathan unto David, Whatsoever thy soul desireth, I will even do it for thee.

And David said unto Jonathan, Behold, to morrow is the new moon, and I should not fail to sit with the king at meat: but let me go, that I may hide myself in the field unto the third day at even.
If thy father at all miss me, then say, David earnestly asked leave of me that he might run to Bethlehem his city: for there is a yearly sacrifice there for all the family.
If he say thus, It is well; thy servant shall have peace: but if he be very wroth, then be sure that evil is determined by him. Therefore thou shalt deal kindly with thy servant; for thou hast brought thy servant into a covenant of the LORD with thee: notwithstanding, if there be in me iniquity, slay me thyself; for why shouldest thou bring me to thy father? And Jonathan said, Far be it from thee: for if I knew certainly that evil were determined by my father to come upon thee, then would not I tell it thee? Then said David to Jonathan, Who shall tell me? or what if thy father answer thee roughly?

And Jonathan said unto David, Come, and let us go out into the field. And they went out both of them into the field. And Jonathan said unto David, O LORD God of Israel, when I have sounded my father about tomorrow any time, or the third day, and, behold, if there be good toward David, and I then send not unto thee, and show it thee; The LORD do so and much more to Jonathan: but if it please my father to do thee evil, then I will show it thee, and send thee away, that thou mayest go in peace: and the LORD be with thee, as he hath been with my father. And thou shalt not only while yet I live show me the kindness of the LORD, that I die not: But also thou shalt not cut off thy kindness from my house for ever: no, not when the LORD hath cut off the enemies of David every one from the face of the earth.

So Jonathan made a covenant with the house of David, saying, Let the LORD even require it at the hand of David's enemies. And Jonathan caused David to swear again, because he loved him: for he loved him as he loved his own soul.

Then Jonathan said to David, Tomorrow is the new moon: and thou shalt be missed, because thy seat will be empty. And when thou hast stayed three days, then thou shalt go down quickly, and come to the place where thou didst hide thyself when the business was in hand, and shalt remain by the stone Ezel. And I will shoot three arrows on the side thereof, as though I shot at a mark. And, behold, I will send a lad, saying, Go, find out the arrows. If I expressly say unto the lad, Behold, the arrows are on this side of thee, take them; then come thou: for there is peace to thee, and no hurt; as the LORD liveth. But if I say thus unto the young man, Behold, the arrows are beyond thee; go thy way: for the LORD hath sent thee away. And as touching the matter which thou and I have spoken of, behold, the LORD be between thee and me for ever. So David hid himself in the field: and when the new moon was come, the king sat him down to eat meat. And the king sat upon his seat, as at other times, even upon a seat by the wall: and Jonathan arose, and Abner sat by Saul's side, and David's place was empty.

Nevertheless Saul spake not any thing that day: for he thought, Something hath befallen him, he is not clean; surely he is not clean. And it came to pass on the morrow, which was the second day of the month, that David's place was empty: and Saul said unto Jonathan his son, Wherefore cometh not the son of Jesse to meat, neither yesterday, nor to day? And Jonathan answered Saul, David earnestly asked leave of me to go to Bethlehem: And he said, Let me go, I pray thee; for our family hath a sacrifice in the city; and my brother, he hath commanded me to be there: and now, if I have found favour in thine eyes, let me get away, I pray thee, and see my brethren. Therefore he cometh not unto the king's table.

Then Saul's anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said unto him, Thou son of the perverse rebellious woman, do not I know that thou hast chosen the son of Jesse to thine own confusion, and unto the confusion of thy mother's nakedness? For as long as the son of Jesse liveth upon the ground, thou shalt not be established, nor thy kingdom. Wherefore now send and fetch him unto me, for he shall surely die.

And Jonathan answered Saul his father, and said unto him, Wherefore shall he be slain? what hath he done? And Saul cast a javelin at him to smite him: whereby Jonathan knew that it was determined of his father to slay David. So Jonathan arose from the table in fierce anger, and did eat no meat the second day of the month: for he was grieved for David, because his father had done him shame.

And it came to pass in the morning, that Jonathan went out into the field at the time appointed with David, and a little lad with him. And he said unto his lad, Run, find out now the arrows which I shoot. And as the lad ran, he shot an arrow beyond him. And when the lad was come to the place of the arrow which Jonathan had shot, Jonathan cried after the lad, and said, Is not the arrow beyond thee? And Jonathan cried after the lad, Make speed, haste, stay not. And Jonathan's lad gathered up the arrows, and came to his master. But the lad knew not any thing: only Jonathan and David knew the matter. And Jonathan gave his artillery unto his lad, and said unto him, Go, carry them to the city.

And as soon as the lad was gone, David arose out of a place toward the south, and fell on his face to the ground, and bowed himself three times: and they kissed one another, and wept one with another, until David exceeded. And Jonathan said to David, Go in peace, for as much as we have sworn both of us in the name of the LORD, saying, The LORD be between me and thee, and between my seed and thy seed for ever. And he arose and departed: and Jonathan went into the city.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Asian HeatWave: Alvin Alfonso

behind his adorable looks and masculine build, there's something about hunky lad, alvin alfonso, that seems to imply a deliciously wild and wicked nature.




known as being a good, down-to-earth model, 6-foot tall alvin first came to national attention endorsing wholesome products such as "colgate", "piknik" and the local telco's broadband internet service. but it wasn't until his turn as the new hot model for "bench", a popular and established filipino clothing brand, did this gorgeous spunk's star truly began sizzling.


alvin's continued exposure in many underwear print ads for "bench" cemented his popularity and status as a sex symbol. his confidence and progressiveness continually saw him baring his sexy physique and boyish smile, first in an issue of philippines' cosmopolitan and more recently in queer magazine, generation pink, complete with a racy image of him on the cover.



"sizzling"

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Gay Birds


Repertory Philippines stages “Gay Birds,” an adaptation of Jean Poiret’s La Cage Aux Folles at Onstage Theater from March 16 to April 1. Set in “Birdcage,” a fictitious Manila transvestite club during the disco/Martial law era, this adaptation follows the travails of the gay couple George and Albert when George’s son from a drunken one-night stand, Emil, comes home to announce that he is getting married. Excited at first to meet his “in-laws,” Albert is crushed to find out that Emil is excluding him from the marriage.


The ups and downs of all the hiding and revealing—all set in one evening—provide comic fodder and sentimental situations on the question of gender, identity, sexuality, and family. More details here.

Gay Birds stars Arnel Carrion, Oliver Usison, Jejie Esguerra, Topper Fabregas, Tony Amador, Dingdong Rosales, Jejie Esguerra, Hans Eckstein, Micah Muñoz, Carlos Canlas, Boyd Tinio, Cathy Azanza, Charlie Barredo, and Naths Everett.

This Repertory Philippines’ production will have its opening weekend be on March 16, 17, and 18. Performances are scheduled on Fridays and Saturdays at 8:00 p.m with Saturday and Sunday matinees at 3:30 p.m.

For inquiries, call Ticketworld at 8919999.

Diskriminasyon 101



Discrimination is common,invisible and remains unaddressed.

A survey done by SWS in 2001 reveal that Filipinos in general held largely negative views toward lesbians and gays. More than 50% of the respondents said that homosexuality can never be rationalized, while a quarter would rather not have lesbian or gays as neighbors.

Discrimination is happening in schools,workplace, communities, public service, in the healthcare system, and most importantly, in the family. In politics and in the media, lesbians and gays also experience prejudice.

Some lesbians and gays encounter discrimination even within their families. According to the Young Adult Fertility and Sexuality Studies, suicide is on the rise among adolescent lesbians and gays due to lack of acceptance in families.

Some schools have adopted a ‘masculinity test’ to screen out gay students. Others have made cross-dressing as a basis of dismissal, while in some schools, organizing lesbian and gay groups is prohibited.

Stigmatization of HIV/AIDS as ‘a homosexual’s disease’ have made access to healthcare difficult for lesbians and gays. For Lesbians, access to reproductive health is sometimes denied Because of negative and flawed stereotypes.

In the workplace, one’s sexual orientation or gender identity is used as a basis for dismissal,rejection, or denial of promotion or benefits.

In politics, the higher the position, the lesser the possibility of having an openly lesbian and gay politician.

The Philippine media promotes flawed and restricted stereotypes of lesbians and gays to sell their products. Lesbians and gays can be
good entertainers or TV show hosts but they can never be TV broadcasters. TV companies also peddle negative images of gays for their ratings.

Discrimination is invisible

Negative treatment of lesbians and gays creates an environment that is conducive for more abuses. People in general feel that since it is okay to ridicule lesbians and gays, negative behavior against them is not an issue.

When raped or when physically abused, lesbians and gays oftentimes hesitate to seek assistance from the police because of fears of further abuses.

While there are no laws that explicitly prohibits homosexual acts, some laws – like the antikidnapping law and the anti-vagrancy law -are used to harass lesbians and gays.

Discrimination remains unaddressed

Other than the anti-discrimination ordinance in Quezon City (2002), there are no laws that protect lesbians and gays from abuses and human rights violations.

Discrimination must stop

In 1999, AKBAYAN party list Rep. Etta Rosales through LAGABLAB filed the Anti-discrimination Bill to penalize discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.

The bill was re-filed in 2004 as HB 634. It criminalizes a wide range of discriminatory practices, among them discrimination in schools, workplaces, healthcare, public service, etc. It is
now scheduled for Second Reading in Congress.

Two counter-part Anti-Discrimination Bills were filed in the Senate by Senators Miriam Defensor-Santiago and Bong Revilla.

You can stop discrimination

This Election vote for Candidates that will support the passage of the Anti-Discrimination Bill in Congress. Push your local government to pass an ordinance banning discrimination against lesbians and gays.




Its High Time!

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Asian HeatWave: Alfred Vargas



Alfred Vargas is a Filipino film and TV actor. He was originally a member of ABS-CBN Star Circle acting workshop batch 10. From there he had his TV role in the drama soap opera Pangako Sa Yo (My Promise to you) from the same network. But this Ateneo de Manila graduate was acting in theatre long before the talent scouts lured him into television.




Undoubtedly his breakthrough role came in the film Bridal Shower by Seiko films in which he was able to display his acting potential as a drama actor. This along with the move to the GMA Network opened a slew of opportunities for the young actor. This move has seen him feature in prominently in three notable shows in Philippine television, the daytime drama Daisy Siete and the fantasy series' Encantadia (as Aquil) and Etheria (as Amarro).

Alfred Vargas also played "Dodong" in the Gay Superhero Flick of Zsa Zsa Zaturnah as the "panadero" (baker) who fell in love with Ada played Rustom Padilla.

Man Diva


______________
Let out the Diva in You!

Pride Manila Chorus auditions*
rolls out this:17 March 2007 Saturday 2:00 p.m.
at the Annex 232 of the UP College of Music , Diliman Quezon City

be ready with:
an audition piece(preferably from a musical)
2×2 photo
résumé

for details, contact:0922-8108997 · 0917-5020981 · 0928-6144592

____________
*this audition is open to gay and gay-friendly men

Monday, March 12, 2007

One Year

There were times my heart bled,
My eyes dripping with pools of water
Times when I stumbled and fell...
But I picked myself up and headed for shore.

Just when I wasn't looking for someone,
When I thought I'd be all alone,
When I believed everything was gone,
I found you...
You brought back my sense of being,
You brought back everything I believed in,
You gave me back my zest for life,
I was back on track.
Thank you for loving me.
But most of all,
For giving me a chance to love again,
And be loved in return...
Thank you...
For the love that keeps me alive,
A heart that reminds me with its every beat,
And a love so precious I discovered in you...

I Love You, Mantra.

______________

Note:

Happy First Year Anniversary Bibi! I Love You!
(better be safe, grammar police are lurking in the dark)

Friday, March 09, 2007

The Sinner


What If?

___________________

“Oh Lord!” Carlos cried as he leaned his back against the door he had just slammed shut. It was a symbolic thing that he had his back to the room of his daughter. How could she have even thought what she was just doing was alright? How disgusting! Even thinking about it, he felt queasy.

He tried to think of what he could have done, remembering the day she first appeared on the earth. He had been praying for a child, they both had together. It was almost exactly five years after their marriage that their prayer had been answered, and the cry that rang from the kitchen startled them both awake.

It had been three in the morning when she had appeared, coming into tangible form in the way nearly all babies did. He was grateful that he had forgotten to close the bread before he went to sleep. Something like that, some act of genuine forgetfulness, was one of the only things that could create a child, apart from God himself.

They had named her Patriacia Louis Cruz, and those first years were a sort of bitter-sweet bliss.

She had seemed so…normal. Always so normal. Carlos felt a wave of nausea once again, and stamped down the stairs to Marco’s den. Marco looked up quietly when Carlos entered the doorway, eyes waiting for an explanation as to the interruption, putting the pages in his hand down as this seemed too important not to allot his full attention toward.

Carlos closed his eyes for a moment, fighting back tears of the parental betrayal. “I found Patricia in her room, and Jayson was with her. Only they weren’t studying.”

Marco gulped. “What do you mean?”

“They were kissing each other.”

“No…” he said, eyes indicating that he was revisiting memories of his upbringing. He had lived with his uncle who had (illegally) married a woman. He remembered the absolute shame of having had an uncle and an aunt, ones who were together. Together together.

“Oh, Marco…what’s going to happen now? What do we say?”

“I don’t know…I suppose we should forbid them from seeing each other.”

“Will that work?” said Carlos, concerned. “Remember those teenaged days, we never listened if we were told not to do something we, unfortunately, had considered right when it wasn’t. Oh, Marc…” He chewed at his lip as the tears glossing his eyes threatened to fall. Marco wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close.

“I suppose we should show her the dangers of a,” he frowned, “straight relationship. Oh God, I never would have imagined…”

“I gotta get away, honey. Let’s go out. I’m sure Jayson has left by now.”

“I’m going to check to make sure.”

“Good. I won’t have him in our house with the way he had his hands all over her. And vice versa!”

“He did?” Not waiting around for an answer, Marco headed out to race up the stairs, but ran right into the boy, who was attempting to do the opposite.

“You little whore,” Marco declared, eyes narrowing as if of their own volition.

The boy hung his head, as if ashamed. “Please don’t tell my mom. Please,” he looked up for a short moment, eyes pleading along with his words.

“I don’t plan on speaking with your mother. You are no longer my concern. Get out. Get out of my house now, and don’t bring her into sin, you depraved little boy.”

Tears were welling up in the boy’s eyes as he pushed past Marco and flew out the door.

Listening at another door, Patricia cried softly.


“An all girls academy?”

“We think it’s for the best.”

“It’s Christian too. You want to please God, right? To stay away from these horrible sins?”

“Yes,” she answered, if a bit hesitantly.

“The bible makes it overwhelmingly clear, Patricia. He made man and woman just as he made tigers and leopards. They aren’t supposed to be together. Don’t you remember Sodom and Gommorah?”

“What about the lion and the tiger! They mate together, they make ligers. It’s not all black and white!”

“Don’t give me this inanity, Patricia!” Carlos shot back. “You know he placed the lion and the tiger in separate parts of the world for that reason.”

“No, Dad, I don’t know that. I can’t know that. And you can’t either! None know the mind of God!”

“Which is why he created the bible, His word. We need to protect you from this urge of yours to rebel. You can’t honestly really like him.”

“But I do!”

“But, think about it Patricia. To have sex with him. Imagine him…well I don’t even know how it would work! Your parts are so different. You’re of different breeds!”

“This has to end, and fast. You can still redeem yourself. It’s never too late to return to God’s favor while you are still living.”

Patricia frowned deeply and her arms crossed across her chest.

“Think of the health risks,” supplied Marco. “Imagine getting pregnant! So unnatural. From what I hear, you would never get over it, the pain of knowing what you had done!”

“I hate you!” Patricia cried. “I hate you!”

“So be it. If you cannot live under our rules, Patricia, cannot become a respectable lesbian, there is just nothing more we can do for you. You may as well move yourself out.”

Wiping at her eyes, Patricia gathered herself a blanket of God-fueled resignation and stood, giving a bow before muttering something about going up to her room to pack.

______________

Note:

What sayeth you?

Happy Weekend Guys.

Stay Blessed, Beatiful and Free.

Bruce at PBB

Bruce Cabral former UP Maroon and PBL Player is now at ABS CBN's PBB

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Homo Santos: St Sergius and St Bacchus


Saints Sergius and Bacchus were two Roman soldiers and lovers. As John Boswell has shown recently they were invoked repeatedly in the middle ages in the blessing of ceremonies of union for couples of the same sex. They were arrested and humiliated for being Christians. Bacchus was killed first, and then a few days later, Sergius. Their joint "passion" calls them "erastoi" - that is "erotic lovers", and after he died, Bacchus offers himself to Sergius as the prize for Sergius' martyrdom. The female clothes they were forced to wear may have been an early example of gay baiting. (One thing that cannot be found among the saints is a male saint who voluntarily adopted women's clothes). Their cult was one of the most intense in the eastern Mediterranean, with a huge pilgrimage site at Sergiopolis (Rusapha). The passage following, translated from the earliest passion by John Boswell, recounts Sergius' laments after Bacchus' death, and Bacchus appearance to him, promising himself as the prize of martyrdom.

from The Passion of St. Sergius and Bacchus

Meanwhile the blessed Serge, deeply distressed and heartsick over the loss of Bacchus, wept and cried out, "No longer, brother and fellow soldier, will we chant together, 'Behold, how good an pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!' You have been unyoked from me and gone up to heaven, leaving me alone on earth, bereft, without comfort." After he uttered these things, the same night the blessed Bacchus suddenly appeared to him with a face as radiant as an angel's, wearing an officer's uniform, and spoke to him. "Why do you grieve and mourn, brother? If I have been taken up from you in body, I am still with you in the bond of union, chanting and reciting, "I will run the way of thy commandments, when thou hast enlarged my heart.' Hurry up then, yourself, brother, through beautiful and perfect confession to pursue and obtain me, when finishing the course. For the crown of justice for me is with you."

Feastday, formerly 7 October; "cults suppressed in 1969" (The Book of Saints, 505).
___________


Note:

Today, Same Sex Marriage is one of the most debatable issue of our times. How ironic that Religious Orders are condemning it.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

The Philippine Blog Award Nominees

The Nomination for the Philippine Blog Award is now officially closed. Below is the Updated list of nominees as of this date, as the organizer still collates the list of entries for the extension period provided.

The Awarding Ceremonies will be held on 31 March 2007, 5pm at Podium 4, RCBC Plaza Auditorium in Makati City.

DATE AND TIME OF UPDATE:
26 February 2007, 10:46AM (Manila Time)

Personal

Entertainment

Technology

Travel

Socio-Political

Home & Living

Photo Blog

Fashion & Lifestyle

Podcast

News & Media

Business/Entrepreneur

Sports & Recreation

Bloggers’ Choice Award

Best Blog Design

Best OFW Blog

Best Free Custom Theme

Best Blog Plugin/Extension

_____________

Note:

Whew! Five Nominations for Hush and Listen! I am really honored guys! Thank you so much! I am proud to be a part of the The Philippine Blog Award 2007.

To All my fellow nominees, Congratulations! May the Best Blog Win!

Cheers!


Tuesday, March 06, 2007

HOMO SANTOS: A PRELUDE

There are over 10,000 named saints, the vast majority being early Christian martyrs and ascetics about whom little if anything is known. Popes only began canonizing in 988AD and canonization in the Roman Catholic Church was only reserved to Rome in 1170, although this was probably not made effective until the Decretals of Gregory IX in 1234. The full canonization procedure only developed in the 17th century, although it has recently been modernized. About 400 people have been canonized by the popes. Other churches, the various Orthodox churches especially, also add saints. The Anglican churches have no process of canonization, but do add certain notable figures - such as Martin Luther (Feb. 18 in the New Zealand BCP) - to their liturgical calendars.

Historically the most important role of saints has been as intercessors. You pray to a saint for a miracle, or for the saint to pray for you. As a matter of semantics it may be noted that there is nothing about "praying through saints" in Catholicism. You pray to them, "prayer" being a general term for a certain sort of address to a second party. What you are not supposed to worship a saint as a god [technically called "latreia"], but you may give a saint "veneration" [technically "dulia"]. This is just as much prayer as worship. The Angelic Salutation for instance [the "Hail Mary"] is a direct prayer to Mary. Protestants have on the whole rejected the cult of saints, but it is a powerful witness to the Catholic and Orthodox belief in the Church as a community of love that transcends life and death, time and space. In general the cult of saints became much more restricted, even in Catholic countries, after the Reformation, and religious practice became more Christocentric, more Mariocentric, and more focused on sacramental life. On a popular level, though, saints are still invoked by millions on a regular basis, especially St. Anthony of Padua as patron saint of lost things, and St. Jude as patron saint of lost causes! Saints are also important as exemplars of Christian virtue. This has probably become more important in recent years, hence Vatican searches for lay people to canonize (most new saints are still founders of religious orders, which spend much time and money on promoting the causes of their founders).

Now, for the 64 Million Dollar Question,

ARE THERE GAYS, LESBIAN, TRANSGENDERED OR QUEER SAINTS?
Join me, as we unravel the untold secrets of the Saints in this new series I would like to call: HOMO SANTOS.

The Bloggy Award

The Bloggy Award takes time to review Hush and Listen, here is the entire review they did for my blog.
________________

This blog should be called Hush and Look with the plentiful images of naked men. A blog by a gay man who’s managed to reconcile himself with his faith, it is full of poignant poems that speaks to you. A warning to those not comfortable with naked bodies and explicitly erotic language - stay out!

Visual Aesthetics


First thing I did? Cover my eyes. This blog has way too many nude men in various poses some artistic, some questionable, some plain disturbing. Apparently this is a gay blog so the author thinks the images beautiful…and some are (if you’re comfortable with nude art). However the average person will probably find this blog really offending to look at.

User Friendliness


Average loading time. Readable text. There are just too many things going on at the sidebar making it difficult to find what you are looking for. The author has a section for his poems, videos, love notes , random thoughts, etc, which is good but the blog will be much the better if the contents of each section is hidden in a drop down menu to lessen the links. Same goes for his blog roll, which is really very long. The nice thing about the blog roll is that there is an indicator that tells you which blogs have new posts.

Reading Enjoyment

The author is poetic and has some pretty good poems although many of them are quite explicit. Personal posts are sincere and not too long. Surprisingly I did enjoy many of the entries once I got over the shock but the too explicit photos still managed to mar my reading enjoyment many times. Those not used to explicit language will also cringe many times while reading some of his more erotic entries.

User Info

Those who enjoy voting for blogs in various blog communities will find some useful information and links in this blog. Gays and lesbians looking for spiritual fulfillment will also find some posts on this blog helpful as it espouses a group that ministers to homosexuals.

Overall Experience

Poetic but peppered with too many erotic and explicit images and language for me. This blog is definitely for adult eyes only. It is very interesting though how the author has managed to reconcile his lifestyle with his faith. Many struggling gays and lesbians will find this blog an inspiration.
____________
Thank you so much to bloggy award.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Finding Love


"Need to look to,
The skies for answers,
Need to cry to,
The earth for this fate,
Need to see through,
These lies my mind tells,
I need not find you,
'Till I am ready.

When I'm ready,
I will find you,
When I'm weary,
You will heal me,
And when I'm clearly,
Looking for you,
You will find me,
Waiting."


Note:


This one's for you - Jed and Glenn. I am so damn happy for you guys! Indeed Love comes when you least expect it come. Mwuah!

Jed is someone dear to me, and bunso - so seeing him glowing with that happiness yesterday with glenn being on his side makes us so pretty excited for him really. Seldom will jed talked about his "personal" life on MCC's testimonial part, especially his love life. But yesterday was different, he have this particular aura I would only people who are in love - and he is!

Damn! Jed is in Love! Yipee!

Glenn was really a fine man - well mannered if I may say. Me and Bunso were making him gaga over our silly antics including bunso's most profound question: "Paano kung mainlove sa yo ang isang halamang dagat?" lolz! All these amidst a pizza dinner at rajah solayman park.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Rape


I had nothing to gain, to lose,
I looked back at the blood stained lips,
I had a life to kill, a decision to chose,
A fist to accept, a body to abuse


To kiss or be kissed, top or bottom,
Darkness shrouded your naked body,
My hands trembled and ran down your chest,
In the softiced ways, my heart jumped --
-- You closed your eyes and breathed.
A breath for me, a flower for me, a touch for me
Tonight it can be us, cant it?

I was in no mind to accept the cold hands,
I looked at your darkened refection in the mirror
I had a life to kill, but in your presence... no fear
A fist to turn away, a body only wanting love

The kiss shifted, not on lips, on neck
Ecstasy, sweat dripped, a nagging--
--don’t let this be done, but silenced
Maybe tonight I can make love
Down your soft skin, down to your pants,
But finding none... you are naked before me

I was in no state, but to escape fate
I looked at you, I pleaded for your love
I had things to prove, I had to impress you
A fist turned inward, stupidity for wanting

In the moon light, your expression causes me nerves,
But the kisses I feel all down my body... the kisses
Surely this must be love, sparky come give me love
I so sorely need, kiss my lips and come lay with me
I am so desperate, kiss me set me free
Sparky, please---
---don’t push me down like a whore, and have your ways with me

But the hands pushed me down onto the bed, useless fag
Commanding me like a whore, to spread your legs,
Done so like a good boy, do as you say,
Spreading my legs, open, but not ready, but willing
To impress, to impress, how can I be no less--?
As I wait for my love to rape me

Shoved down to the bed, mounting the dead
Thrusting hard inside, ignoring my painful cries
The claws on the bed, skin against thread
Mounting the dead, to the horror shalt devils begin?
Thrusts shoved in, mouth twisted moans, no kisses
A rape by a lover, I pushed back, avoiding pain
Stinging pain, silence screams, ravaging me, oh god no--
--but spark, look into my eyes I love you
Look closer and see...

I was in tears, moon lit, heart broken tears
I looked to the sky and screamed as my world fell down
Screamed in heart break, screamed without making a sound
I had things I had to prove, to prove your love for me
A fist I collapsed and cried, and hated love for what it did to me

I was screaming, eyes open, face twisted, body bloodied
Hands fisted, cocks sucked, asses fucked, soul broken
Top and bottom, fucking the fucker, I pushed and I pushed,
I felt the contraction, the wet orgasm; he had in my hands,
Satisfied and panting, looking up at me, in fathoms
You raped me but you still looked so fucking handsome
Laying in moon light, cum like shimmering sparkles,
Wiping sweat off your brow---
You invited me into your arms

I was broken and bloody, in pain and in tears,
But into your arms I crawled, and I felt little fear
I looked to your face, and I saw obligation,
No love for the whore no compassion, no creation
I fell asleep broken- I gave up the fight
I made a decision as I lay
I died in your arms that night
______
Note:
Alas! I was able to finish this piece after Three Weeks!
Enjoy your Weekend Guys!
Stay Blessed, Stay Beautiful and Stay Free!

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Eyespeak

One single tear
Drop in the ocean
Of fathomless
Reflection
The voice
Of pristine
Emotion

The Muse

Congratulations to the Filipino Lesbian for winning the G* Spot Weblog of the Month for February 2007. Joy Joy's blog have top the race by 36% - 148 votes, of the total votes cast for this month.

So, guys, please dont forget to drop by to her blog and see for your self why fellow bloggers thoughts that this is the most deserving blog amongst all the included in the list.

Again to, The Filipino Lesbian, Congratulation! Keep ranting!

This also marks a new month for the G* Spot Weblog Award, so do expect a new line up of good blogs and new reads.

To all voters and fellow bloggers who keep on supporting this race, thank you very much. Please keep on supporting The G* Spot Weblog Award, this time for the Hot, Hot, Hot month of March!